YESSSS! I am finally Twenty! I mean hello twenties…
The big two bloody oh. Like WOW. TWENTY. When did you, it, us, we happen? It literally feels like next year that I was writing the blog post about why I can’t wait for my twenties and how I feel like I am mid twenties mentally (or a granny mentally).
Now look, I am aware twenty is VERY young. Especially to be a blogger, blah blah blah, I have heard it all before. And I am aware this it still very much the beginning of my youth. However I just can’t help feel that the beginning of my twenties and the whole new decade that I am going into will be the best of my life and TBH I have ready for it. Don’t worry I am still trying to appreciate the fact I have fairly good skin. My body isn’t falling to pieces and I have somewhat got my eye bag under control… for now.
But what I am trying to say is that the fact I am now twenty excites me very much. Now whilst my birthday is going to include lots of eating, drinking and going to a Christmas market. But I thought I would grace you with some of the things I have learnt in the last 7300 days that I have been living and breathing for.
This year has taught me that I have a hell of a thick skin. I haven’t had the best of years. I call it the curse of 19 because I just don’t like the number and as it has been 2019 and I have been 19 its been a double whammy. However even though I have had some ups and some downs I have come out the other side and boyyyyy it feels good. And it makes me realise I can do anything now that I have gotten through this year. You know what? It feels really bloody good to say that.
Friends come and go but you know the ones who are really truly there for you. I have let go of anybody negative in my life. Even though it sounds ruthless everyone has to do it at some point for their sanity. Sometimes people just grow apart and thats okay too. People aren’t generally bad people, but some you will never see eye to eye on different perspectives and sometimes its better to accept that and move on. It is something I have done over the last few years and it feels good.
Sometimes it is better to take a step back from things and realise you have to do what you enjoy. I have realised that time is going on and I can’t do everything that I had to do, like work and blog and do uni. And something had to give for that and for my own state of mind. From stuff that has happened this year, I have started realising that sometimes it is better to do something for your own happiness rather than for practical reasons.
I need to work less. There I said it. Being in my second year at university means I have a huge amount of work to do in comparison to last year. But I don’t know how I have been keeping up posting on my blog three times a week. It has been hard and I found myself bulk writing posts for months in advance. This was the only way I could do it, however I felt like the quality of my posts lacked. I will talk about this more in-depth in the new year. But I have big plans for my blog… primarily QUALITY OVER QUANTITY.
I need to go on holiday more often and appreciate the things and sights we can see in this world. Yes my excuse to book a holiday.
If I have earnt my money then why can’t I do what I want with it. Over the last year from work I took on a bigger role and I got more money from it. Now I have cut down my shifts and have been *attempting* to make something of my blog I have got a few pennies from that too. But either way I have worked hard. I don’t go out and drink. Nor do I go buy drink. So if I feel like I want a new jumper I know I can afford it so why the hell shouldn’t I. I have set up an ISA, set up savings, bought myself a car. And a decent car at that. Its my money and I am proud of what I have made so I need to treat myself.
I don’t need to follow what everyone else thinks I should be doing. For example, I don’t need one night stands, I am a relationship girl. I don’t need to drink to have a good time, I will be the driver on a night out. I don’t need to make excuses for anything.
Its taken me twenty years to ask for the Harry Potter box sets for Christmas even though I am utterly in love with it still.
I have just discovered Gavin and Stacey and I kick myself for not watching it before.
That I should put myself back out there on the dating cards. I have shied away from it as love can be a terrifying/daunting/painful thing in the world and that is something I have really suffered from this year. But finally SHES BACK and I am going to start practicing what I preach.
Have you had enough of all the cringe cliche comments? I hope not because here are ten more…
11. My love for the rugby player Owen Farrell is still real.
12. I still cannot sing and that my singing should be kept under wraps until I am in my own company – so no karaoke in the pub to embarrass myself deeply.
13. There is a fine line between opening up and keeping stuff to your self. I can be quite an open person and sometimes that works to my advantage and disadvantage. I have found I just have to be careful who I say what to and what I say.
14. Show off what I have done with my blog. I have always kept my blog very own the down low when it comes to my personal life. For example I never told anyone about it until nine months in. But this year, I have been opening it up, sharing it on my personal social media accounts and doing a bit of self-promo because why shouldn’t I be proud of it?
15. I have started liking spinach – aka I need to stop being such a fussy eater.
16. I am a hard worker and a perfectionist which means I probably do 100x more work than I need to but I won’t give anything up until its done to my standard.
17. RE point above I can be very lazy though especially if Netflix is involved.
18. Emily and wine don’t really mix – but sometimes it can be funny.
19. If I don’t like someone they will know and I am not afraid to speak my mind if someone has annoyed me. I don’t like leaving someone in the lurch like that and I would rather talk to them about it.
20. That even though I am twenty age is JUST A NUMBER! If I feel older than thats okay, and if I get to thirty and want to redo my twenties then why the hell not??
From a now twenty year old Emily who is eating all the chocolate in the world before I go to a Christmas market.