11/11/2019

Is It Important To Be Pretty Or Just To Feel It?

Here’s the real self confidence kick up the ass you need… YOU ARE PRETTY. 

So here is the thing. For the last two years I have worked behind a bar, pulling pints and just earning my keep. But for those two years I have always found myself subject to derogatory comments about the way, or some of my female colleagues look. Yeah okay, working behind a bar can come with some sort of objectification. But when its the 60 year old creep making the comments it just infuriates me and sends shivers down my spine.

No matter what I look like, what size I am, how big my tits are, or what I am wearing. I am simply there to earn a bit of money to make sure I can go for my weekly Nandos. I feel like if I don’t look ‘okay’ then I am looked down on. This got me thinking as to whether I actually need to look ‘pretty’. Or if I feel it will be enough for me. 

If you look in the media, any female icon in our society is subject to comments about the way they look. Take the Duchess of Sussex for example. Did you see that video of her where she looked like she was going to cry because of the bad media she faced during her pregnancy? Or the countless amounts of articles over what Kate Middleton is wearing on her latest royal tour.

Yes okay, not all the articles are bad. But they are all based around what she is wearing. Possiblywhether that means she is expecting another child. Don’t even get me started on that topic or we will be here all day. But WHY on earth does that matter? We all wear clothes, we chose to wear makeup or not. We all have our own way of styling. Its not like we can walk out butt naked. So why do females in the public eye have to be objectified because of the way they look? Mind boggling really. 

But its not just royals, or politicians or bloggers who face it. The issue spreads across society, fro musicians to actors. And I don’t think you ever really see men at the forefront of this issue. There are many of plus size male famous faces, all of whom I am sure we adore. But there isn’t a new article about the next diet they are on, or whether this outfit suits their body shape or not. So why does this idea of having to be pretty just apply to women? 

I am aware I am writing this in the view of a fashion blogger. Someone who builds up a following based on their visual representation. To be honest, I can’t count the amount of times I think I need to look like this. Or need do this with my hair. Maybe buy this jumper to feel like I am fitting in with that idea of ‘pretty’. I wouldn’t even say this is because of my own insecurities. Yes, I do have them. However 90% of the time I am happy with what I wear etc. But I am more worried about other peoples insecurities towards the way I look. 

I think in school, we are all given this perception we have to be like a certain way. At school age, your are somewhat more naive to comments made and way more vulnerable, with a thinner skin. So comments like ‘Oh man, she’s fit’ from the boys leaning up against the school halls. Or ‘Ew nah mate, she’s grim’ stick with us more than if we were older. Your social groups in school have labels, like the ‘fit popular girls’ or the ‘rejects’. All based on LOOKS.

Of course as you get older, and more mature you realise life has so much more to offer than just worrying about whether you are pretty or not, but at a young age, this can be such a big deal. I mean when I was in school I has one guy message me going ‘Yeah you’re really pretty, but every time I see you in school you look so grumpy you look like you want to kill someone’ – THANKS MATE thats just my resting bitch face. 

Even though some of us are caught up on angles, and lighting to make us look perfect in every photo, I think we all look pretty in out own ways. I don’t see a definitive definition of ‘pretty’. Why does it have to have a solid definition as we don’t all act, look, dress, or like the same things. 

Okay yeah, sometimes I look at people like Gigi Hadid and I would probably swap looks with her in a heartbeat (I mean who wouldn’t she’s bloody beaut) but we need to push for the idea that what we were or how we look isn’t important. There is more important things for media outlets to report on. And we need to push this. 

We should all feel pretty because we all are. 


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4 responses to “Is It Important To Be Pretty Or Just To Feel It?”

  1. Lucy says:

    It’s more important to feel pretty! If you feel pretty, then you can feel so good about yourself that you won’t care what others think! x

    Lucy | http://www.lucymary.co.uk

  2. That was everything! What a well-written thought provoking post. I face the same conundrums and am not sure if it’s a situation of my own making or I’ve learned what’s expected of me and just go along! Who knows ?! X

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